Historians and whims. 2-3 years. Very useful article.

Parents believe that a preschool-age child is a small child, affectionate, sweet and obedient. But already at 4 years old, children sharply begin to show character. They stop listening to mom and dad, and adults in general, they become rude and even take revenge. This can happen for many reasons. Basically, if a child at 4 years old does not obey at all, is capricious and throws hysterics, then we are talking about improper upbringing.

In this way, children react to insufficient communication with their parents, their rudeness or excessive softness, as well as excessive prohibitions. And you shouldn’t hope that the problem will disappear on its own over time. It is important to notice, determine the cause of bad behavior and correct the shortcomings of upbringing.

Why doesn't a child obey at 4 years old?

A 4-year-old child is already an individual. He notices and understands a lot. Such children are very emotional and sensitive. Sometimes, for seemingly no good reason, they begin to behave inappropriately. Why is this happening? The reasons for a child’s bad behavior can be:

1. Lack of communication with parents. Just recently, the baby felt like the center of the Universe. They walked with him, played with him, loved him and spoiled him. But over time, everything changes. Mom goes to work, returns late and does not always have enough strength to communicate with the baby. This situation causes him a kind of protest. Therefore, the mother should explain to the baby that she needs to work in order to buy him sweets and toys, that he is already an adult, but his parents still love him.

   
   It is also important to try to give him free time - play with him in the evenings, spend weekends together.

2. The presence of strict restrictions and prohibitions. Of course, allowing your child everything is unnecessary and even harmful. But it’s also not worth keeping it strictly. During this period, the formation of personality occurs, the baby demands more freedom, wants self-expression. The little person should be helped, supported, and stimulated in his attempts to cope with a certain task.
3. Humiliation. Parents often scold their child for any offense - breaking a plate, spilling flour, spilling tea. Children with physical disabilities or other pathologies are often criticized and humiliated. The more vulnerable cry and withdraw into themselves, while others, on the contrary, throw hysterics and do not listen. This is how they take revenge on their parents for disrespect and humiliation. In this case, only affection and love will help. You should pull yourself together and be patient.

   
   Even if something doesn’t work out for the baby, he needs to be helped and supported, and not criticized.

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4. Injustice. Sometimes hysteria occurs from time to time. This is how the baby reacts to the unfair punishment of his parents and shows his resentment.

Also, a change in a child’s behavior for the worse can occur as a response to lies, broken promises, conflicts between parents, or divorce.

See also:

A child is hysterical at 2 years old - what to do and possible causes